I’m in the business of helping women change their lives. I see your potential and I get to help you live up to it. Seriously, I have the coolest job in the world. Every day I get to introduce women to the BIG Life they were created for and set them free to actually live it.

Now there’s a common scene I see replay over and over again as women change their lives and begin living better … they’re disappointed by the lack of support they receive. They imagine everyone they know and love will be overjoyed for their journey and the reality is far different than they imagined.

So, not everyone is jumping for joy over your new found success, huh? And maybe instead of support, you’re feeling resistance. Let me help you understand what is happening here because the truth is, it happens to most of us.

Your change can be a threat to others. Your improvement creates and inner struggle for those who love and care about you most. While they may not be able to fully understand their internal battle, these are the questions they’re feeling inside as they watch you change:

“What if you no longer have time for me? What if you want me to change too? What if you becoming better makes me look bad? What if our relationship changes? What if you no longer need me?”

Your friends and family are watching you on the journey and they’re likely scared and wondering what does your change mean for them. If you go on a diet does the whole family tense up? If you set a goal is everyone on high alert? Understand all these questions are going through their minds. How are you answering those questions for them?

Do you expect them to change too? Matthew 5:13 & 14 tells us that we are to be the salt and the light of the earth. What does that mean? Well this was back before refrigerators and salt was used to preserve and protect food. You are supposed to be the salt for your family, protecting and preserving, but as you change and improve your life, are you preserving your family’s happiness? Are you protecting your family time, or are you replacing it little by little? Oh! That hits some of us right in the gut! Are you preserving and protecting your family? Unfortunately, all too often, we aren’t preserving and protecting our family as we seek to improve ourselves. Instead what we do is we nag and we push. Misery loves company and if we’re miserable with waking up earlier, eating raw carrots instead of potato chips, and cutting back the spending, we make everyone else miserable too. We complain about how hard our journey is, and let’s face it, that’s not too enticing to them. Why would they want to change if you’re so miserable while you change?

Have you ever put too much salt in your soup or on your mashed potatoes? It literally becomes intolerable? Too much salt in something delicious can’t be eaten. Too much of your talking about this new way of living and Big Life will become intolerable for your family. You will push them away and sicken them. So what do you do? You let your happiness speak for you! Let your example show and let your happiness shine like a light. But remember as you shine, your light may be painful to others. Blinding almost. Your change may reveal their stagnant place in life that doesn’t seem to be improving, and when you shine a light on those dark places in their life it’s painful for them. So be kind with your light. Always let it shine with love. Don’t flaunt. Don’t brag. Shine with love and guide them to the light.

And be cautious with your salt. It is to preserve and protect, not overpower and choke. The right amount of salt creates a thirst. Do you want your husband to change? Do you want your family to be impacted? Do you want to create fans and supporters on the journey? Then spread your joy and happiness, not your misery and overwhelm. Sprinkle lightly instead of dumping out the whole salt shaker and you will then create a healthy thirst for the same in the lives of those watching you.

Hey girls, we are called to be different. We are called to be an example. We are called to be the salt and the light in this world. People are watching me and they’re watching you. We are the example of what a Big Life is supposed to look like. Every single person was created to live a Big Life and unfortunately not everybody is living it, but they are looking at us and saying, “Alright, what does that look like?” We are to be the salt and the light to our family. To every single person we come in contact with, and yes social media. But remember, go easy with your salt, don’t choke them! Don’t overpower something beautiful. And remember to shine your light with love because when your light shines in someone else’s darkness it can be painful and scary. It can make them run and hide. What a responsibility we have today. Let’s make God proud today. Let’s use our salt and light with love today to help someone else along the way. Let’s not push, brag, or flaunt. But also, let’s not hide. We have a responsibility to show the difference that God makes in our lives. To show the difference it makes when we step into the Big Life we were created for. And let’s show it with love and compassion today.