We’ve all heard the saying “misery loves company”. It’s true isn’t it? Well, let me tell you something else… Misery might love company, but so does joy. And joy throws much better parties.
You get to choose the party you throw and the party you attend. There are pity parties and there are joy parties … and these two are not equal.
You may think when you’re feeling miserable you want someone to come along and feel miserable with you, but what you really need is someone to invite you to a joy party. Joy is contagious. And you know what else joy is? Joy is STRENGTH!
Nehemiah 8:10 “This is a sacred day before our Lord. Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!”
And that applies to today. That applies to every day. Every day God gives you is a sacred day. It’s special. It’s set apart. And in this day, joy will be your strength.
Now think about that, if joy is your strength, and the enemy of your soul wants to make you weak and ineffective, doesn’t it make sense that your joy is under full attack? And doesn’t it make sense that opportunities for misery and invitations to pity parties are in abundance? Of course! Without joy you are weak. If you are weak, you’re not living up to your fullest potential and showing up as the girl you’re created to be.
If the devil can’t defeat you, he will settle for discouraging you. If he can’t take you out, he will settle for taking you down. If he can’t turn you to evil, he will settle for exhausting you.
The devil resides in the pits of hell in misery. Misery loves company. He is continually trying to lure you into misery with him.
I once had a less than brilliant idea. Okay, I admit, it was more than just once. I’ve had multiple less than brilliant ideas. But one particular idea was to have a Colonoscopy Retreat. Why? Because colonoscopies really aren’t awesome and it seems easier to go through crappy things with others who are going through crappy things. (See what I did there). So, we all book a colonoscopy at the same hospital for the same day. I rent a retreat house near the hospital, we all stay together, we all go through the prep together, then we all recover together. Seems like a great idea to share the misery with others who are miserable. But there’s not a house out there with enough restrooms for that crappy retreat.
You know what you need when you’re going through that? Someone who has gone through it, understands it, but is on the other side of it! Not someone sitting in it with you! You’re useless to one another both miserable. It’s a pitiful party.
Joy is your strength. Get yourself around JOY! Draw from their strength.
But, what do we typically do instead when we’re struggling? We withdraw. We hide. We avoid anyone or anything that could be positive, and we gravitate to the negative. We throw our pity party and we invite other miserable souls to be miserable with us. Ohhhhh how the enemy of your soul loves to show up at that party with party favors. Here’s hopelessness for you. Here’s overwhelm for you. Here’s jealousy for you. Here’s bitterness for you. Check the party favors you’re receiving at your gatherings. Are you walking away worse?
Cancel that party and get yourself in the presence of joy. If you don’t have any joy of your own to bring, sit close to those who do. Again, it’s the opposite of our instinct, and you may have to force yourself to attend a joy party when you’re feeling anything and everything but joyful, but strength is offered at the door at this party. Strength is found in the presence of those who refuse to wallow. Strength is found in the gathering of those who choose joy. Strength is found in the room dedicated to shifting their thoughts, changing their perspective, and clinging to the truth. Get yourself in that room!
This morning, while writing this very devotional, by divine appointment, I overheard an AA meeting being hosted in our retreat house on zoom. One of our sisters was attending her daily AA meeting. People gathering to receive strength. People celebrating recovery. People finding joy in sobriety. They’re better together, by God’s great design. They’re choosing their mindset, making their commitments, helping each other and taking their next steps. Studies show the success rate for them increases by 60%.
What room are you walking into that increases your odds of success because of the mindset offered there? What table are you sitting at that promotes joy? What circle are you gathered in that seeks God’s truth? Oh, the parties there are beautiful! Make sure you’re there!
Now, ask yourself, what room, what table, or what circle is doing the opposite of this? Where is misery spreading? Where has negativity caused an infection of minds and caused damage? It’s a bad party. Excuse yourself! God’s girl doesn’t belong there.
Going back to our scripture for today, Nehemiah 8:10, “This is a sacred day before our Lord. Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the LORD is your strength!” Look at those words: DON’T BE DEJECTED AND SAD. Don’t sit there. Don’t dwell there. Don’t accept that as your permanent address. Don’t do that. You sacrifice the strength offered to you by God there. You totally miss the fact that you woke up to a sacred day of life.
There’s a warning found in Deuteronomy 28: 66-67, “You will live in constant suspense, filled with dread both night and day, never sure of your life. In the morning you will say, “If only it were evening!” and in the evening, “If only it were morning!”
Does that sound familiar? Are you living in constant suspense? Are you dreading the day and dreading the night. You catch yourself thinking, “If only …” If only things were different for you. If only this changed or that happened. Then, change happens and you still feel dread. What you’ve been waiting on to happen finally happens, and guess what … misery still looms. This is the trap the enemy wants to keep you in.
God’s invitation is to step into the presence of his joy and find strength. Find beauty that makes your soul light up, and savor that beauty. Pause in that beauty. Let it get inside of you. Find people who radiate joy, and instead of hiding from them because you can’t match their joy, rub up against them and let their joy overflow onto you. Just like an AA meeting, some people are 30 years into living in joy, others are trying to master day 1. No doubt, we are better together. We do need each other.
I have joy to offer you. My joy is a gift from God. If you’re running low, this was the perfect place for you to be today. Thank you for not hiding. May joy rub off on you and give you strength for your next steps.
If you are one that carries joy within you, offer it to those who are struggling. Those who dreaded this morning. Those who are living in constant suspense and chaos. Don’t dismiss yourself from the responsibility to help them. You may not have the answers for them, but an invitation to your joy party will give them completely different party favors. Gifts of love. Gifts of patience. Gifts of peace. Gifts of kindness, gentleness, elf-control. Gifts of goodness.
Misery might love company, but so does joy. And joy throws much better parties.
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